New Ventures

Well, seeing as how it’s practically a new month, it seems like the ideal time to unveil my latest plans.

 I have decided to just quit everything (e.g. drop out of school, etc. because I mean, come on, screw school, it’s not as though we actually learn anything anyway) and open a JELLY BEAN factory. Of course, should it do well, like Willy Wonka’s, then I would expand my horizons to other delectable treats such as chocolate and bubble gum and others.

I’ll run the whole operation from my sub-level basement and hire house elves… although I’m not too sure yet exactly where I shall find them. (Psst, if you’re looking for employment, send me your resumes!) Any ideas?

They won’t be regular jelly beans either; oh no. I was thinking of starting with ‘Rotten Egg’ and ‘Partially-Decomposed Garbage’ flavours. Sounds delicious, n’est pas? Think Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans. But muggle-ized.

In fact, not only is this idea totally going through, you–that’s right, you–can contact me with details as to your specific preferences and such. (As far as I know, data collection is quite an essential part of a successful business.) Pre-orders can start being placed now! Go ahead, you know you want to.

🙂        Yours sincerely,



Trackbacks & Pingbacks


  1. * Tally & Zane says:

    Oh, well that’s most certainly the way to go! You would totally pwn the jelly belly company!

    | Reply Posted 10 years, 9 months ago
  2. Why not smoothie flavored? Your business would boom if you had smoothie jelly beans.

    | Reply Posted 10 years, 9 months ago
  3. * Lena says:

    Yes, time to quit school. Screw teachers, screw books! YOU’VE GOT JELLY BEANS!

    | Reply Posted 10 years, 7 months ago

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: